Five Stars
C for SEE Through
Marriage.
Seeing with greater
clarity -under the light of God- the common issues that arise in a marriage, is
what this book is all about. It is a very helpful text that does a great
service in furthering the correct understanding of the love of God. The love
that must be enlivened by a man and a woman when they enter the covenant of
marriage despite all its possible conflicts and difficulties. In this sense,
this book is neither naïve nor legalistic in its advice; it recognizes our very
human weaknesses and empathetically addresses them according to sound Bible
principles. I particularly enjoyed how it underlines over and over again how
the marriage union must lead a couple to Oneness in Christ. Nothing less. This,
of course, is a necessary step to take for many of us who also hope to achieve
oneness in the Church of Christ, for how can any married person aspire to reach
communion with the body of Christ if he or she cannot be on the path to union
with his/her spouse? Indeed, many of the problems and blunders that prevent us
from having a unified church are what prevent us from having unified marriages.
A marriage is, for many
of us, a training ground where if we truly want to do so, we learn how to be
humble, forgiving, patient, self-controlled, steadfast, kind, wise, discerning,
content, grateful and hopeful in Christ. In brief, a marriage can help us learn
the love of God by loving. However, there are many times when we stumble and
far from love we dwell on jealousy, selfishness, resentment, anger and fear.
During these moments we need sound advice and a helping hand to get out of our
rut. This book provides just that. The lesson pertaining each word is concise
and easy to read. I also found the use of c-letter words for each concept to be
a helpful mnemonic technique. And, above all, the self-examining questions that
the author makes at the end of each chapter are particularly useful in
discerning the darkness of some of our intentions and behaviors. Of course,
this is so for as long as we ponder them seriously and desire to answer them
with honesty, no matter how painful our conclusions may be. After all, it could
be that the reason why we married in the first place was not true love or
charity as the author names it. But love (or charity) defiled as he also very
well points out. Something that we believe is love but in fact is far from it.
But if this is the case, we must muster the strength in God to address and
repent from our delusion and this book can also help us do that.
On the other hand, I did
find myself disagreeing with a few of the words and sentences used by the
author to describe some issues, but after reading the whole book and knowing
how hard it sometimes is to choose the correct words to express something, I
also found that what I understood through those words and sentences is not what
the author advices as a whole. For example this sentence: “Many marriages built
without Christ do survive, and some of those with him do fail.” I believe that
no marriage that is being built by a couple with Christ as its foundation and
direction will ever fail. Truly, as the author also points out: “Divorce is a
concession to our sinfulness.” And “No one just falls out of love. It takes
much time and effort to get it done.” So, except for those reasons stated in
the Bible about separation from a spouse, if any people renounce the covenant
of marriage out of sinfulness, they better examine what they have believed and
to what they have given their heart instead of Christ. Perhaps to idols? If
they do this with sincerity, repentance and a lesson on charity defined will
then be in order.
Finally, I think that
the greatest praise I can give this book is this: Of the myriad of “christian”
books out there, I hardly read a few because most of them are precisely that:
“christian.” Appealing lies mixed with truth that ultimately lead people to a
hole. This book, however, I found it to be written in love for Christ and for
the edification of His church. I thank the author for that.
Kind regards and best
wishes,
Luis
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